Here Is Gone.
So this it it.Your exit is my entry into another chapter that probably won't include you.
Your closed door is an open one for me.
I can't say I'm surprised.
All the same I wasn't fully expectant.
Our path has forked.
Ironic really, when you did what you did so it wouldn't.
I hope you enjoy what you missed.
I am only sorry you were not able to foresee circumstances.
Know that I'm not angry, or writing this in spite.
But know that in principle your word was broken.
So to ask for continuity once you go through the departure gate
Is really quite out of the question.
If I should end up where you are, it doesn't instantly mean we'll be together.
If I don't end up where you are, I will appreciate a new start, a clean slate.
Sometimes we have to let it go.
And through this I am learning that.
You'll get your life back and I'll remake a new one.
I love you.
But am I still in love with you?
That is questionable.
Especially so when it appears I'm easy to walk away from.
When the going gets tough people are supposed to stick through it.
Thats why the word endurance means what it does.
Maybe you're just resistant to change and I thrive on it.
Maybe you need someone who will be happy living in your bubble.
Maybe I need someone who is willing to stick around through varying circumstances.
Someone who's seen me go through so much and not judged me once.
You can say your leaving doesn't affect us.
But it does.
It tarnishes the trust.
Without which, I've already mentally started letting you go.
So when you do physically, my heart will not break.
And I will walk my own road
One that leads me back to myself.
posted by LadyNik @ 7:30 pm
3 Comments:
*HUG*
hope everything turns out okay in the end babe.
xxx
I gave all I could and I am honestly saying that. Maybe I couldn't see my own limits but originally i said I wanted to get you out and that was my goal all along and you told me you would come to melbourne anyway.
I mean this sincerely not spitefully, I'm sorry I can't be enough.
Rachel - thanks hun. See how this cookie crumbles. x
Jeremy - Yes, I'd come to Melbourne/Australia anyway - for myself, from ages ago. "my own limits" "I said I wanted" "my goal" - Where am I supposed to fit in?
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