...I don't know. Maybe I just need sleep. Maybe that's why I keep tripping over my thoughts and thinking I'm blundering when I probably am not.
Baby, I know a considerable part of it is love. There's also another part of me trying to pinpoint exactly why it is you affect me and have an impact on me the way you do. I don't mean affect negatively, I mean, in compelling me to do the things I do. The things that I know will make you feel better or things that you'd probably appreciate gesture-wise despite feeling somewhat guilted out. Like the post before this and editing the other one.
I didn't feel particularly comfortable talking to him tonight because when I was in the study, my Dad was around. When I went into the kitchen to get a drink, Mom ended up in there. I didn't want to wake my sisters up, and neither did I want to sit out in the living room and have either of the parentals walking in on my conversation. Which probably explains why I landed up in their room. There's something strangely comforting about sitting on the edge of your parents bed while you talk to your boyfriend. I know my parents aren't the prime example of a good relationship, but I know somewhere amidst all the crap that happens they do love each other. Things have definitely become more imperfect at home, with them, and with me and them, but sometimes its nice to just pretend for a second you're five again and going back to Mom and Dad will make it better. Except tonight I sat on their bed with the lights out obviously without them. Why am I even pondering this?
If it's possible to ache with needing to let him know that I love him, that I'm sorry and that I just trip up sometimes, this is probably it. Although I know he already knows. So why am I still like this? I don't know. Maybe I'm just looney.
These lyrics pretty much explain it I think. It's one of ours.
Maybe I'm Amazed - Jem
Maybe I'm amazed at the way you love me all the time
Maybe I'm afraid of the way I love you
Maybe I'm amazed at the way you pulled me out of time
and hung me on a line
Maybe I'm amazed at the way I really need you
Maybe I'm a girl and maybe I'm a lonely girl
who's in the middle of something
that she doesn't really understand
Maybe I'm a girl and maybe you're the only man
who could ever help me
Baby, won't you help me understand
Maybe I'm a girl and maybe I'm a lonely girl
who's in the middle of something
that she doesn't really understand
Maybe I'm a girl and maybe you're the only man
who could ever help me
Baby, won't you help me understand
Maybe I'm amazed at the way you're with me all the time
Maybe I'm afraid of the way I leave you
Maybe I'm amazed at the way you help me sing my song
Right me when I'm wrong
Maybe I'm amazed at the way I really need you
posted by LadyNik @ 11:58 pm
1 Comments:
I listening to it after that.
Maybe your just amazed?
lol, ok come down off your high horse now jeremy. (and it was lame)
I love you!
Do you know that?
And you know I know you love me.
So don't feel down.
And please don't ache.
Cause I know it.
I'll always know it.
Thanks for the way you spoke to me today ;)
:D
It was... exciting :)
I love you very much my love.
And we are very much in love.
And always will be.
Its just a fact :)
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